Color me eco

Let’s say that you’re the mayor of a city with big ambitions, a rich history, and basically no money. You take over from the previous mayor, whose big ambitions took him to Congress where, after taking advantage of duping a bunch of starry-eyed lefties and the much less naive corporate lickspittles political strategists up at Democratic Party HQ, proceeded to vote against every piece of legislation that someone elected as a Democrat might reasonably have been expected to support. Also, you have this monkey on your back. Since the nation’s experiencing a major economic trauma and your city (also state) has a tax system structured to keep the rich rich, the poor poor, and everyone dependent on public services largely SOL, you’ve got to find some way to balance the budget.

One of your strategies is to eliminate the city’s totally inefficient curbside recycling program. This program was a big failure whose meager successes may have included appeasing some lefty types into believing they were Saving The Earth One Cardboard Tofurky Lunch Slices Box At A Time and providing jobs for a few of the city’s developmentally disabled. So you cut it. While saying you’re doing this because you’re actually for recycling in the form of a massively expensive and virtually untested boondoggle plasma plant.

You are a pragmatist. Can’t sell cars if you’re not. You don’t want to seem like you hate the earth (especially not with this monkey on you), and you don’t want to alienate the ten voters or so who really cared about the city’s moribund curbside recycling program, and all of this especially not on EARTH DAY.

Solution? A coloring book, of course. With a temporary tattoo! Distributed to elementary school students all over the city! To show that the city cares! While it continues to fall behind nearby Troy in its environmental policies. Good work, Mr. Mayor! And thanks to regular reader Kathleen for the tip!


3 responses to “Color me eco

  1. This outstanding municipal artifact is sure to soon be clogging our landfills. On the plus side, those “evil” litter bugs seem like they are having a good time.

  2. I know! And why is the planet smiling while they defile it?

  3. Wow. Please Please procure me a copy of this artifact.

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